A Heartbreaking New Stance On Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss In Loving Memory Of Someone

Disclaimer:

This is an article discussing serious topics, such as cyberbullying and suicide. Reader discretion is advised, along with the suggestion to call the suicide prevention line in your country if you are feeling suicidal:

UK – 116 123

Australia – 13 11 14

Canada – 1 833 456 4566

USA – 1 800 273 8255

New Zealand – 0800 726 666

I adore the first season of Hazbin Hotel for its vibrant animation, adult humour and amazing songs and I think the four-year wait was worth it [61] [62] [65] [67], despite a few problems the season has [78] [96] [97], but before I could finally embrace the musical sinfulness [63], a tragedy occurred nearly a month before the premiere [79]. It was bad enough that there have been issues corrupting the Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss fandom’s image [7] [77], such as footage of “Queen Bee” being leaked from Pateron in an unauthorised manner around the Christmas break of 2021 [4] [32] [72] [84], but this is possibly the worst tarnishing of the fandom imaginable, much to my dismay. The suicide of a young hazbean was reported during the Christmas break of 2023 [19] [45]. You may recall fan of Steven Universe attempted suicide after being harassed by some others for drawing a character in a different body type back in October 2015 and how horrifying it was to hear about [5] [33], but in this case of something as unspeakable as bullycide, an innocent fan’s life was lost [20] [45] [46] [71] [73] [99]. I have been looking forward to the rest of the second season of Helluva Boss and the second season of Hazbin Hotel after the success of the first one [9] [42], but that excitement has, unfortunately, been decreased because of the suicide of a hazbean who felt like they had no place in the fandom anymore [45].

I am NOT writing about this incident for clout as it is a subject I take very seriously and genuinely feel sickened about [19] [45]. It was also bad enough that the famous image of Jeff the Killer was rumoured to have been created from a photograph of someone who committed suicide due to bullying before the claim was disproven and a young girl was almost stabbed to death because of two friends of hers believing that the Slender Man was real in 2014 [2] [3] [35] [48]. As much as I still stand by how I do not condone any harassment against those who insulted me for being a video game journalist back in December 2021 as I lamented on the issue at the time [93], I do not condone any hate or harassment against anyone involved in the incident to “avenge” the fan who never got to see what they were looking forward to and was nicknamed “Shay” [45], so please do not start another flame war within the aftermath of mourning the loss of a heartbroken hazbean. [63]

Just to clarify, I was never involved in the harassment as I do not engage in ridiculous shipping wars. I stopped tweeting on X, formerly known as “Twitter” in July 2023 after feeling like I had no other choice and I have hardly socialised on certain Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss Discord servers due to how busy I tend to be with writing [45]. However, I am still consumed by guilt as a fan of the Hellverse as someone who I was in a toxic friendship with called me a “Helluva Boss simp”, claimed that the termination of their YouTube channel was my fault and warned me that if I blocked them, they would commit suicide and their blood would be on my hands about a month later as that was how they felt when they were blamed for the alleged suicide of someone they knew. Nearly a year ago before that, a content creator lashed out at me, calling me the C-word and threatening to commit suicide if I did not stay quiet all because I suggested that they change their username to move on from their trauma [44]. Despite my laments, this is not about me. This is about mourning the loss of a fellow hazbean and hoping that we can prevent another suicide in the Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss fandom [19] [20] [45].

Despite how I was never involved in the situation described in a Google document [19] [45], I feel like I have some partial responsibility to warn you about how far toxicity can go as a hazbean who has analysed and reviewed eleven episodes of Helluva Boss and doing so could potentially make up for how I failed to address the allegations of a toxic working environment at SpindleHorse during the production of the first season of Helluva Boss and such. I want the prevention of another suicide in the fandom from happening, along with healthy working conditions at SpindleHorse being maintained more than I want the writing of Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss to be even better [23] [52] [60]. [58]

Shay was missing the older times of being a hazbean when they felt safer and much happier in the community [45]. To be honest, I am starting to miss the older times of being a hazbean as it was a coping mechanism for me from 2020 to Spring 2022, despite the issues I had with “Spring Broken” and “C.H.E.R.U.B.” [49] [55] [94] [95]. Moreover, I still have nothing against any hazbeans preferring the continuities of the pilots and old Voxtagram stories as I still see some wasted potential of the pre-Season One images in the art quality of the pilot for Helluva Boss on the accounts representing the main Helluva Boss characters [15] [16] [25] [26] [27] [54]. I began to pick up some aspects of toxicity since the premiere of the second season, such as blatant insults at the fandom that come off as unfairly generalising on Twitter/X [17]. Speaking of insults, Shay claimed that they were yelled at and called names throughout the storm of a “Us vs. Them” mentality in a Discord server and felt lied about almost all ships being tolerated [19] [45]. It is devastating how Shay ended up feeling like the years she spent as a hazbean were wasted and felt used and shunned as an old fan of the Hellaverse during the gathering of newer fans excited for the premiere of the first season of Hazbin Hotel [45].

Even though the concept of Hell’s version of Instagram in Helluva Boss was revived as “Sinstagram” in “Ozzie’s” and “Seeing Stars” and potentially made up for the controversy surrounding the Instagram account representing Octavia known as “gothchk17” that was a red flag in early 2021 [14] [53] [56], I have a feeling that some fans who are thankfully still alive but still miss the times when being a hazbean did not seem like being chained to toxicity as much, quite like how Shay felt before they took their own life [45]. The speculation that Shay was autistic makes this subject even more distressing to me as I am autistic and I had suicidal thoughts before [1] [19] [85]. I wish someone would have told them that being alone does not always mean being lonely [38]. [56]

Shay was a supporter of RadioDust who felt ambushed by the toxicity sounding the support for HuskerDust [19] [45]. I admire the gradual progression in Angel Dust and Husk’s relationship in the first season of Hazbin Hotel, most notably the song “Loser, Baby”, which is what makes me see the full potential of HuskerDust and praise parts of Husk and Angel Dust’s character developments [64]. I can also see why many would ship Charlastor [49], even though I prefer Chaggie, not just because it is canon [66]. I may not see the likeliness of RadioDust [49], but I hold no ill will towards that ship. Furthermore, it was repulsive how witch-hunting was affecting Shay in a highly unnecessary shipping war [45]. And of course, not every hazbean has to ship Stolitz from Helluva Boss [54] [56] [58]. Besides, I can see the possibility of Stolas finding a new male love interest after the events of the music video for the canonised version of “Look My Way” and “Full Moon”, the forthcoming eighth episode of the second season [42] [59] [94] [95]. I completely sympathise with how Shay felt throughout the difficult time they went through as when I was still a fan of the Sonic the Hedgehog franchise [45], I felt ambushed when supporting the overhated shipping from Sonic ’06 known as “SonElise”, which is one of the reasons why I no longer consider myself a “Sonic fan”, but I still appreciate other SonElise supporters’ defence [18] [74] [75].

A fellow hazbean of Shay’s by the name of “Liv” did their best to console Shay during their struggles [45], quite like how I tried to help two fans who felt left out of a project proposed by Eric Schwartz, the voice of Chaz from “Exes and Oohs” last Summer [28] [29] [30] [51] [87] [88], but got blatantly misunderstood while they were being called out for seeking sympathy the wrong way [6] [8] [34], which made me quit Twitter/X. Liv deserves some admiration for their nobility and honesty [45], so please show them some compassion as many other hazbeans still consider the Hellaverse a coping mechanism. [51]

Although I am disgusted at the religious belief in committing suicide directing you straight to Hell [69] [83], no matter how good you have been as a person, I hope that a big part of the Heaven for Shay is an alternative interpretation of Hazbin Hotel where RadioDust is canon and is probably about as wholesomely and realistically portrayed as FizzarOzzie in Helluva Boss [44] [52]. I also hope that more critical takes on Hazbin Hotel will not use such a tragedy solely as an excuse to bash it, along with the fanbase and even justify insults towards the staff at SpindleHorse [39]. [64]

I feel so disgusted and awful about what happened to an innocent RadioDust shipper that I should probably stop reviewing episodes of Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss altogether at some point [19] [45], but please do not blame the fandom as a whole [21]. Suicide is a subject I take very seriously, which is why I consider “C.H.E.R.U.B.” my least favourite episode of the first season of Helluva Boss [89] [90], but I have nothing against it being dedicated to the mother of Adolfo Rodriguez, a clean-up artist for some episodes [36] [50] [70], much like how “Ozzie’s” was dedicated to Steve Dorian, another clean-up artist who went by the username “Lemony Fresh” [37] [53] [82]. I nearly lost my passion for blogging twice in 2023…and I might lose my love for Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss [19] [45] [94] [95], like how I lost my love for creepypastas in October 2015 [98], but again, this is not about me. This is about hoping to not let such a tragedy like this happen again. I hope that Vivienne Medrano or anyone else at SpindleHorse will take some time to reflect on this tragedy [43] [47] [76], even though they are not to blame for the harassment that pushed Shay into taking their own life [22] [45], so please refrain from attacking Medrano and even attempting to dox her [41] [43], in spite of her following some of Shay’s harassers on Twitter/X [45] [81].

I never thought I would go from critically acclaiming “That’s Entertainment” and hoping for the best outcome of the first season of Hazbin Hotel outside of YouTube [49] [91] [92]…to paying my respects to someone who adored the intellectual property since the days of the pilots and old Voxtagram stories and feeling guilty about what happened to them [45]. I feel trapped in a never-ending cycle at this point [96]. In loving memory of a fan who sadly committed suicide due to being ganged up on and feeling abandoned as an old fan of the Hellaverse [19] [45], let us refrain from cyberbullying and be kind to one another. My deepest condolences go out to Shay’s friends, family and the one who wrote the Google document nicknamed “Liv”. May they rest in peace. [59]

Despite the possibility of me no longer being a hazbean because of the guilt about Shay taking their own life due to cyberbullying [20] [45], I was told that I am not a bad person for admiring the Hellaverse [40]. I have tried my best to be as honest and respectful about the tragedy affecting me and my love for it as I can, but I deeply apologise if anything seems inconsiderate. Again, please call the suicide crisis helpline in your nation if you are feeling suicidal [86]. Also, please show some support for Cristina Vee, the voice of Verosika Mayday who felt like she had no choice but to leave Twitter/X due to harassment over a blatant misunderstanding [24] [31] [68] [80]. [53]

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