The Barbie Movie Going Gold Six Months Later

Barbies and GentleKens, I proudly present…a brief analysis of the aftermath of Barbie: The Movie! It has been half a year since the ambitiously marketed feminist masterpiece was released and became a hit that made over a billion dollars [7] [92] [93] [94]. There has been some speculation on how the film can gradually progress into a franchise ever since its largely profitable success [92] [93] [94]. The designing of the Barbie Land sets allegedly caused a global pink paint shortage and a lot of pink within the film’s marketing must have been quite a headache for those who do not like the colour [65] [82] [92], but the cinematic power of pink continues with some new recipes at Kaspa’s to promote the brand new film based on the Broadway musical adaption of Mean Girls [53] [54] [55] [71]. Hop on this light blue 1950s Corvette as we head back to Barbie Land after listening to Deadpool’s speech on Mr. Lively’s behalf about winning a broken Emmy [3] [52] [76]! Yes, it is the one that can be spotted outside a Barbie’s dreamhouse [7] [52]. And no, I am not the one driving. The merc with a mouth is the driver because “Do not hijack Barbie’s car!” is not one of his New Year’s resolutions [86]. 

“That’s right! Get in, loser [59]! Laura is writing another article about the Barbie movie and the musical reboot of Mean Girls is out now in the USA [71], which is a convenient time for me to tell you to get in for the sake of quoting the original AND the musical reboot [59] [60]! Barbie’s box-office hit is pretty much Black Panther for all the lovely white women out there [42]. Not that I would judge my little Laurapop for adoring it [41]! And I certainly wouldn’t blame her for being so thrilled to finally see the first Deadpool 3 trailer that might be shown at this year’s Superbowl first [40] [70]. God bless you for that beautiful motorcycle helmet you wore in Las Vegas, Esteban Ocon [68]! And God bless Wrexham’s soccer team for its sexy co-ownership [76]! Take it away, Laura honey!” [76]

Thank you very much, Deadpool! Some would say that my approval of Barbie: The Movie is just a “phase”, but even the New Year’s fireworks ceremony in London expressed some Barbie flair with a lot of pink fireworks [28]. Now, what else is there to say about one of the most successful films of 2023 [27]? [39] [51]

The film and its creative team’s achievements have been listed one by one through social media posts since October [16] [26], including:

• The Hollywood’s Music In Media award for “Best Soundtrack Album” [17]
• Eight Astra Awards, including one for “Best Picture” and one for “Best Original Song” [16] [18]
• The Golden Globe award for “Best Picture” [13]
• The Art Directors Guild nomination for “Best Production Design” [25]
• A place in the Top 10 Films of The Year by the American Film Institute [27]

Did I just remind myself of Deadpool listing achievements earned by Nickelback in Once Upon A Deadpool [1]? In addition to Barbie: The Movie’s success and achievements, the latest Q+A panel centred on its acclaim featured Maya Rudolph on the first day and Angelique Jackson on the second day [19] [24]. I am aware that the film’s writing has not handled the issue of patriarchy that well to some of us [7], but interestingly enough, copies of the screenplay in print became available to pre-order a month ago and are exclusively from Faber [20] [21] [44] [46]. The new golden equivalent of the film’s logo with an amethyst as the dot of the “I” say it all in a nutshell. If the term “Go woke, go broke!” is always the case [78], then how come Barbie made over a billion dollars at the box office, became the highest-grossing film of 2023 and won several awards [13] [17] [18] [92] [93] [94]? 

Wait! You do not suspect that Golden Queen from Skylanders: Trap Team is behind this transformation [84] [95] [96], no? Hopefully, some adorableness from the seventh generation of the Littlest Pet Shop franchise can take our minds off the possibility of being turned into gold by her [35]. [15]

Eat your vampiric hearts out, Twilight book covers [56] [62]! Not that it is wise to always judge a book by its cover though… [46]

Coincidentally, a new line of Barbie dolls has been revealed during the latest posts on the social media accounts promoting the movie and such bragging about its nominations [8] [9] [10] [11] [12]. The line titled “Career of the Year” in quite a Dr. Seuss style includes [36]: 

• An actress with a Barbie doll’s equivalent of an Oscar [9]
• A director with a script [11]
• A studio executive with a white smartphone [10]
• A blonde-haired cinematographer [12]

Why not let one of the dolls based on Margot Robbie as “Stereotypical” Barbie be a co-star on set [5]? I would still love to see an official autistic Barbie that is respectfully and accurately portrayed and NOT associated with Autism Speaks at some point [77] [83] [88]. No blue jigsaw puzzles please! The importance of producing toys representing various occupations aimed at girls is undeniable [8], which is no wonder why I hoped for a second version of Pixel Stars Digital Dreamhouse that featured three new characters who are a musician, a writer, and a sportswoman nearly three years ago [91]. Please continue to give the hardworking women in the film industry, from the writers to the actresses some admiration and support, especially as we have at least learned something from the strikes in Hollywood and a few disturbing exposures [79] [87].

This doll line could be the one female filmmakers will endorse! [8]

Let us look back on quite a firm suggestion for an effective sequel to Barbie or a spin-off centred on Ken [93] [94]. I still stand by how the problem surrounding the matriarchy of Barbie Land pushing Ken to corrupt it into a patriarchal equivalent of it called “Kendom” could have been handled better in a spin-off film simply titled “Ken” as he has a lot of potential to redeem himself whilst discovering his own identity without relying on the role as a Barbie doll’s boyfriend that a Ken doll has played since 1961 [7] [14]. After all, the film has been accused of misandristic undertones but was ultimately praised for its elements of feminism in honour of what Barbie stands for, especially in today’s society [7] [20] [92]. Quite similarly, “All About That Bass” by Meghan Trainor, one of the most popular songs of 2014 was praised for its elements of body positivity but criticised and satirised for fighting fire with fire as a music critic can tell by its signs of shaming skinniness [6] [38] [69] [85]. I am sure that there will be more shades and tints of pink for new Barbies to pull off in Barbie Land [63] [64], but more importantly, there ought to be no fighting pink fire with blue fire as Ken vows to redeem himself [93] [94]. 

And speaking of redemption, can Nine be redeemed near the end of the third season of Sonic Prime [67] [80]? I guess I ought to find out with my fiancé, even as a former Sonic the Hedgehog fan. Not that I would leak any spoilers as there is currently a lot of aggravation towards footage of the first season of Hazbin Hotel getting leaked [4]. [67]

And as always, if anyone’s claim is mentioned in an article of mine in a negative light or just simply for having an opinion that is not concluded to my own, please do not go and attack them as they are references to back up my own statements, not to encourage witch-hunting or viciously shame people solely for their opinions [89] [90]. Please leave the “Keep your opinion to yourself!” mentality in 2016 [45] [73]. Trust me, I know how aggravating it has been to be a target of it from experience. [58]

In conclusion, Barbie: The Movie deserves the praise it got for its humour, set designs and depth [7] [20], but a sequel or spin-off can make up for its accusations of misandry within political satire [92]. It is currently available for streaming on Max [22] [58]. Perhaps a sequel to the film could alternatively result in a crossover with Hot Wheels, G.I. Joe, or another live-action interpretation of Monster High to take the cinematography and set designs to the next level…or there can be a reboot of the infamous Bratz movie from 2007 that notably makes up for all its flaws [26] [29] [32] [37]. After all, there is a spookily adorable collaboration between Polly Pocket and Monster High for fans of a ‘90s kid’s pint-sized playmate to open and close [81]. Speaking of spooky cuteness, raunchiness and redemption in the Pride Ring of Hell await sinners on Prime Video in about a week after the first few spoiler-free critical takes on the first season of Hazbin Hotel [48] [49] [50] [74]. Lately, I feel like I am not smart enough to be interesting [23], but as someone who owned quite a lot of Barbie dolls as a child [88], I wish the plastic fashion icon a happy 65th anniversary [34]. Anything else you would like to say, Deadpool?

“As always, leave the naming and shaming to Daddy, Laura. Thanks for featuring me in an article on Barbie Quinn’s big financial success once again [88] [94]! I am NOT jealous at all! well, except that there is possibly a little bit of envy in my voice. You are at least smart enough to have written articles about me [87]. I’d better get my sexy ass into the Valentine’s Day flair next month as I’m stayin’ alive with my stunt double [47] [66]. See you in the first official trailer for Deadpool 3 eventually and Deadpool Volume 10 this April, reader [40] [57] [70]!” [75]

Thank you for the special guest appearance once again, Deadpool who just HAD to hijack another car from Warner Bros. [86]! I still suspect that a follow-up to Barbie: The Movie can introduce Teresas and Christies in Barbie Land [30] [33] [92], as well as some deeper character exploration for Beach Ken, possibly a lovely purple princess castle for Princess Barbies to reside in and perhaps a stable for all the Kendom horses and some new Barbie Land pegasi and unicorns to be cared for in [93] [94], quite like the ones Plushi Fantail built in Minecraft recently [72]. Have a blast at this year’s MegaCon at London, all you cool cosplayers in Britain [43] [61]! [2]

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